Is christian dating wrong

25 Jul

There was a time during my unmarried years when I griped that the only women who were drawn to me were "old ladies, female relatives and little girls." I wondered what was wrong with all the eligible bachelorettes who were overlooking me. I might have realized that I was trying so hard to get dating right that I just ended up getting it weird.

I think back to the many first dates where I discussed my thoughts on marriage before we had even finished our meals — weird.

Say something — anything to let her know you're not just looking for another friendship (and not over text, email or Facebook — do I really have to say that? And when the two of you start spending more time together, and she makes it clear the feeling is mutual, don't stop there.

It's going to take some work to win a woman over — huge investments of time, money and humility.

A healthy woman will pick up on the fact that you feel comfortable with yourself, and it will go a long way toward helping her feel the same way.

But once you've done the work of making yourself more emotionally attractive, don't start aimlessly pursing women just because they'll say "yes" when you ask them out.

She says it brought clarity, made her feel honored, and quieted some of her nagging insecurities about whether I was actually into her.

If you're just showing up in a woman's life to take her for a friendly test drive, she will sense it, and she won't feel completely safe.I'm not saying you can't make a move until you've figured out you want to marry her.I'm just saying you need to evaluate what you know about her and decide whether there's something about her that intrigues you. But if there is, don't just sit on your hands and hope she figures it out.Either they were apathetic to engaging with women one-on-one, or they actually believed that ambiguous social interactions were enough to keep things moving — well, it kept them moving alright: toward frustration and resentment on the part of the women who couldn't figure out where they stood with these guys.In retrospect, I think we all could've used a good verbal shin-kicking to yank us out of our alternate realities.